O.K., so I definitely have a pile of laundry sitting beside me right now, calling out my name. It's also 1:48 and I still have yet to shower for the day (gross, I know, but I've been steaming floors and scrubbing toilets-happy Monday to me!). However, I am going to stop for a minute and share with you something that has really rocked my "Parenting View" over the last 24 hours.
Some friends of mine went to hear John Rosemond speak at a local church yesterday-where Knox goes to MDO. I have heard of him before, but I have never read anything by him or listened to any talks that he has given. It was 1 pm when I got the invite to go at 2 pm, and I am so thankful that I went. SO thankful.
I love to read, and being a new parent I particularly love reading books about parenting and children. I am sure most of you are in the same boat. Hear me when I say that listening to John yesterday completely rocked my world, and he had SO much scriptural back up and research that it was just insane. We drooled over his message and we clung to every word. Pages of notes were taken. Mental light bulbs were "going off" left and right. I was encouraged to the core with every word he had to say. It all made sense.
I could probably type about all that I learned yesterday from his 3 hour talk for about 10 hours, but I won't. I wish I could upload my notes to the blog. I honestly am scared to even describe his teachings, for fear that I will not do an adequate job. Pretty much, he addressed the fact that society has all mothers guilt ridden, stressed out, and exhausted these days, and 50 years ago...that wasn't the case. We have bought in to so many lies about being a mother and a parent...so many lies that are no where to be found in scripture...and we are really struggling because of it. Mainly, dealing with discipline. Somewhere along the way we have lost sight of being a true, Godly, supervising parent, and we have replaced that with being a friend, child-pleaser, child-obsessed mother. We have placed the child as the center of our universe and are too scared to discipline them the way that God intended. We are striving for our children to have the best grades and accomplishments, and no where in the bible does it talk about accomplishments for our children... it only addresses the character of the children we are raising. While we should strive to instill a sense of healthy self confidence, we are going overboard in making sure they have the highest self esteem...which only leads to them having lower regards for others in many cases. Humility and modesty should be the desired attributes, but unfortunately the world tells us that those are not worthy ones to have. He goes on to say that demographics show that children are much LESS happier now then they were in the 50's. He said that he cannot remember a single person that struggled with ADHD, depression, anorexia, cutting themselves, suicide, etc. Not one. Now, the stats show that predominately every single teenager across the nation knows of a peer that struggles with at least one of these strongholds. Does that make your stomach turn or what?? We argue and justify with our children and give them reason to believe that they have some kind of authority to make their own decisions. We desire to please them. We do everything BUT tell them to do something...we ask, plead, bargain, etc. We should not have to persuade our children to be obedient. God gave us authority over them to raise them the way He intended. We are responsible for them. John gave MANY scriptural references. He gave many applicable examples that were age appropriate. He addressed so many other things, but unfortunately time does not allow me to share. To sum it up, he believes that all the "new" strategies for parenting that we have adopted over the last 50 years is counter productive, and we are wearing ourselves thin trying to make sense of it all. He definitely acknowledges that there will always be bumps in the road...we live in a sinful world. But he makes it very clear that the only "parenting handbook" we should go by is the word of God.
Anyways, I'm sure that I did not do this poor man any justice by attempting to explain how amazing his talk was yesterday. He has a good bit of literature out for specific seasons of your parenting life. I snatched
this puppy up so that I can read it on our trip. I am by no means trying to cram this down your throat, BUT...if you are looking for a good read for parenting and discipline, I'm pretty certain this one won't disappoint!
