We had our family over to the house to celebrate sweet Greer's first year of life the Saturday after her birthday. I still can't believe she is 1. As soon as I typed that last sentence, my eyes started watering up. Isn't it amazing how the simplest things about being a mom can make you so emotional? The older I get and the further along I go with having kids, I am understanding that it is O.K. to be emotional, and it is definitely O.K. to cry. I did not grow up believing that, and it has always made me uncomfortable, but these are tears of sweetness that are forming, and I know without a doubt that it is the Lord softening my heart and reminding me that He alone has given me so much to be thankful for. So much.
It's hard to believe that a little over a year ago, I had just ordered boy bedding again and was scheming up future basketball teams with Lawson boys. My, oh my. I was dead set on believing that boys are all that I wanted and all that I "needed". And then you know what happened next - the famous gender switching ultrasound. That ultrasound not only "changed" the gender of my baby...it changed everything about what I once believed, and it has also changed my life completely.
I thank God everyday for giving me a daughter. I do not love her any more or any less than I love Knox. It's just a completely different kind of love, and I am so thankful that I get to experience it. I would be lieing if I said I wasn't afraid of raising her...that I don't stand over her crib at night begging God to protect her heart and to keep her pure and satisfied in You alone, and to show me how to raise her to experience a life much unlike my own. Not that I had a terrible life. I had great parents. I just made so many mistakes and poured my life in to so many things that lead me to dead ends, broken hearts, self doubt, dissatisfaction, rejection, etc. I want a completely different life for her, and as hard as it is to swallow the fact that I don't have too much "good advice" or "good experiences" for her, I rest in the hope that God will use everything in my life to help mold her in to the godly woman he desires her to be. Everything. And I am encouraged by that. After all, look what He has done for me. He brought me out of a miry pit and gave me a firm rock to stand on...along with the most incredible husband that I could have ever dreamed of or imagined. If He can do all that for me, then surely He can use my life - and all my baggage - in a positive way to help shape my children's lives. If He can do it for me...He can do it for anyone.
So, it has taken a little while, but my fears and concerns and doubts about raising a little girl are slowly but surely turning into excitement...and a strengthened relationship with the Lord. Nothing will make you pray like the thought of a pre-teen / teenaged girl :). Ha. And quite frankly, I have the same worries over my son. I guess it's true about what they say - you never stop worrying about your children...no matter what gender or age they are. Hilarious. I sound like I have a house full of teenagers right now.
Anyways, coming back from my little detour I just took, we had a great time at the house celebrating Greer, and all that she means to us. She has been a blessing in every sense of the word, and it has been an honor to raise her. I wouldn't change 1 thing about her. Am I eager for her to get some hair so I can stick a bow in it?? Yes. But I wouldn't change 1 thing about her :).
I have about 1,000 pictures on the big camera, but these will have to do for now. I wanted to go ahead and post about her birthday and her stats before she turned 2. I can honestly tell you that they are not the best pictures - at all - so I promise to update with pictures from the camera soon.
Greer wearing the tu tu that I made. For 30 seconds. And then she wanted it OFF. Diva.
Aunt Reba and Uncle Grant came :)
A sweet, sweet friend from bible study made this precious hat. Too bad Greer wanted NOTHING to do with it. O'well. There's always next year.
I'm pretty sure that I will never get tired of those lips and cheeks.
She was so dainty about the cake, it was hilarious. She had birthday pancakes that morning and wanted to feed herself with a fork, and she did. It was amazing. Lee and I just stared in amazement. Every bite went directly in her mouth and there was minimal mess. We were waiting for her to wipe the corners of her mouth with a napkin. Really? Who's child is she? We finally took her little hand and made her get a little messy just for the camera's sake :)
Lolli have her a nightgown and a baby doll that had a matching gown. How cute is that? She LOVES baby dolls. Again-who's child is she?
Fuzzy picture, but we had a pinata and that puppy was a huge hit (no pun intended)! The kids loved it and went crazy when the candy fell out. We had a silly string war in the backyard, and WOW is all I can say. I don't think we will do that again. It was an incredible mess. But...all the kids had fun, so it was worth it this 1 time :).
Unfortunately, that's all for now, folks. I feel like such a loser for not posting all the other pictures, but the kiddies are starting to stir from their naps, so duty is calling.
Thank you, Lord, for this sweet baby girl...and thank you that your ways are ALWAYS higher than mine. Even when I'm certain a basketball team is what's best for me (and heck...who knows? It could still be in my future :)). May Lee and I honor and glorify you as we continue our best in raising her and her brother in Your image. We deserve nothing, but you gave us everything.
Happy 1st Birthday, G-Girl!! We love you so much!